JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — Hubbard House is launching a new initiative designed to bring more men into the conversation about domestic violence prevention, with the ultimate goal of creating violence-free relationships throughout the community.
Joe Kovacocy, incoming chair of the Hubbard House Board of Directors, joined Kristine Bellino in the studio on In Depth to discuss the new “Not My City” initiative and why the organization believes prevention starts with engaging men and boys before violence occurs.
“We want to make every relationship violence free,” Kovacocy said.
The initiative was made possible through a grant and builds on Hubbard House’s longstanding partnership with Men Against Violence Against Women (MAVAW). While that program has existed for years, Kovacosi said the new effort is designed to be more grassroots-focused and reach people where they live, work and socialize.
“We’ve always resonated really, really well with women, but not necessarily as well with men,” Kovacocy said. “So this is our initiative to get out there and really kind of get men involved in the mission of Hubbard House.”
Rather than focusing only on helping survivors after abuse has occurred, Hubbard House hopes to emphasize prevention through education and conversation.
“We’re not only treating survivors, but we’re also teaching our men, our young men, parents, friends, peer groups how to deal with and ideally prevent domestic violence,” he said.
Equipping men to have difficult conversations
Bellino noted that changing culture and even changing the language people use can be part of reducing violence. Kovacocy agreed that communication matters, but said the larger issue is teaching men how to navigate difficult situations and conversations.
“I think it’s more of teaching men how to have these conversations with their peers or their children, to establish boundaries, to discuss consent with parents and their children, be it daughters or sons,” he said.
He said men also need tools and strategies to intervene when someone in their social circles is struggling with unhealthy relationships.
“If you’re in a male-to-male peer group and you have someone that’s struggling in their relationships, it’s teaching your children ways to react and get those aggressive tendencies out in safe means,” Kovacocy said.
The goal, he said, is to empower men throughout Jacksonville to recognize warning signs and help prevent abuse before it happens.
“It’s a difficult conversation, and this is a way for us to engage and energize the men throughout Jacksonville in this mission.”
Men can also be victims
While domestic violence is predominantly committed by men, Kovacosi emphasized that men can also become victims and deserve support.
“Absolutely,” he said. “We do have men that are victims of domestic violence as well, and they need to be able to be supported and be given options and understand unsafe situations.”
He acknowledged that men are responsible for the majority of domestic violence offenses, but said Hubbard House wants to address the underlying causes rather than only responding after abuse has taken place.
“We don’t want to talk about survivors,” Kovacocy said. “We want to talk about prevention of domestic violence and minimize it.”
Progress, but more work remains
Bellino asked whether Hubbard House has seen local impacts from its outreach efforts.
Kovacocy said there has been some stabilization even as Jacksonville’s population continues to grow, but the organization has not yet achieved its ultimate objective.
“I think we’re being effective, we’re helping survivors, but we are not hitting the end goal,” he said. “We want everything, every relationship to be violence free.”
Businesses and organizations encouraged to participate
Kovacocy said businesses, men’s groups, fraternities and other organizations can become involved by inviting speakers from Hubbard House or Men Against Violence Against Women to discuss domestic violence prevention.
“We can get our representatives out and talk to these groups to start spreading the message of Not My City,” he said.
Individuals interested in joining the Men Against Violence Against Women initiative can visit the Hubbard House website and sign a pledge to live free of domestic violence.
Bellino noted that simply talking about domestic violence can be challenging because many people are uncomfortable discussing it.
“It’s difficult to talk about,” Kovacocy acknowledged.
He said there are often situations in which friends, family members or bystanders know violence is occurring but do not intervene.
“There’s too many times where someone’s aware of domestic violence happening or occurring and it just requires some intervention,” he said.
“We need those bystanders, those friends, families, those mentors, those men, those role models to intervene and prevent.”
Male Engagement Meeting scheduled June 30
Hubbard House’s Male Engagement Meeting and the launch of the Not My City initiative will take place Tuesday, June 30, from 5:30 p.m. to 6:30 p.m. at Cox Media Group Jacksonville’s Farr and Farr Performance Studio, located at 11700 Central Parkway in Jacksonville.
The event will officially kick off the new program and provide attendees with information about ways they can become involved.
Participation and speaker opportunities are available at no cost through the grant supporting the initiative.
Those who are unable to attend but would like to request a speaker for their office or organization can email education@hubbardhouse.org to learn about available opportunities.
Kovacocy said visibility and community presence remain important parts of the effort, something reflected even in his trademark purple sneakers.
“It’s a way for us to be present in the community and recognizable,” he said.
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